18 Ways to Build Self-Confidence

Actions that Will Increase Your Faith In Yourself

August 2, 2023 |

Adam's First Sky Dive. Growing my self-confidence.

As your self-confidence improves, other parts of your life improve as well. Often relationships strengthen, you see opportunities you missed before, and your focus & creativity improve. You CAN improve your self-confidence by taking action. 

While you might believe that self-confidence is something you develop and feel before taking action, the opposite is true. You build self-confidence and feel energized after you take the right actions. Below are 18 actions that you can take.

18 Self-Confidence Building Actions

Action #1: Take Risks, Fail, Get up

When you fail, get rejected, or embarrassed, and still choose to believe in yourself, you’re growing. Commit to doing 2 scary things today and tomorrow. Make that phone call, ask for the sale, sign up for the class, call a friend from the past, meet someone new, etc. Your self-confidence grows as you do things letting go of the outcome. In other words, you let go of the outcome . Make 1 courageous decision by the end of the day today. Here’s an article on one scary action for many – making new friends

Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Get out and get busy.” ~ Dale Carnegie

Action #2: Have Boundaries with Others

If you’re not comfortable with how someone in your family treats you, make your concerns clear.  If someone violates a boundary you have established, kindly push back. Stay true to yourself. Respect yourself!

Action #3: Keep Boundaries with Yourself

If you make a commitment, do whatever you can to keep it. If you commit to getting up at 6 am to work out, keep this promise to yourself. Each time you keep promises to yourself, your faith in yourself grows. Each time you compromise, your view of yourself is damaged. 

Action #4: Know Yourself & Love Yourself

You cannot be yourself until you start getting to know yourself. Figure out what you enjoy. Explore new hobbies. Journal consistently and use the 100 journaling prompts to help. Meet new people. Be less concerned about what others think of you and more concerned about being yourself, regardless of what others think. Put your own self-care first.  

Action #5: Deal With Your Past

You cannot heal something that you deny impacts you. My clients have found freedom from accepting their past. Join a support group. Hire a great therapist. Learn how to let go of the past so it stops influencing your future.

Action #6: Put Yourself First

Unhealthy and codependent people put others’ needs ahead of their own. They fear they could be rejected if they say “no” and have boundaries and they soon lose themselves. Take time for self-care. Buy yourself something nice. Splurge. You’re worth it.

Action #7: Be Grateful & Assured

Choose to focus on what you have rather than what you don’t have. Choose to focus on your opportunities, not your obstacles. When you need a boost, go to gratitude.

Action #8: Express Your Emotions

Identify how you feel, why you feel that way, and what you need. Kindly tell others. Be assertive. Have the courage to be emotionally honest and ask for what you need and want.

Action #9: Trust God

Step 3 of the 12 steps states, “Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.” Choose to trust that no matter what, you WILL make it through. There is ALWAYS HOPE!

If you found this information helpful, SUBSCRIBE TODAY to receive my free video and workbook SHATTERPROOF YOURSELF: 7 Small Steps to a Giant Leap in Your Mental Health. 

Action #10: Be Humble

I can be filled with self-pity. I can be arrogant. Both perspectives are faulty and ego-driven. I’m at my best when I’m humble, remembering that I’m no better and no worse than anyone else. I’m best when I remember my true value

Decision #11: Take a Break from Work

Stepping away from work is hard for me, partly because I love it. Taking a break helps you understand what’s important. It motivates you to be more efficient as well. It increases my creativity. Track the number of hours you work each week and learn to delegate. Take half and full days off consistently.

Decision #12: Create a Vision

Create in your mind a clear picture of what you want your life to be like in the future. It could be 2, 5, 10, or 20 years from now. Be specific about your dreams. Spend time reflecting on this vision and live today as if it were your reality. Here’s an article and worksheet that can help.

Decision #13: Go to Acceptance

This is key to unlocking the joy of today. Acceptance of yourself, others, your past, and your current circumstances gives you a foundation to build upon. You may need to say the serenity prayer over and over again.

“God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, and Wisdom to know the difference.” ~ Reinhold Niebuhr

Decision #14: Explore Your Options

It might not feel like it, but you DO have options. Look into new career opportunities, new hobbies, traveling, and new friendships. You CAN be loyal to your current obligations while keeping your heart open to new opportunities. Options increase hope!

Decision#15: Focus on a Plan

I’ve had 3 different life coaches. In some fashion, they’ve all helped me clarify a plan for my life. They have challenged me to go further than I thought possible. In most cases, an OK plan that you follow, is much better than a great plan, you don’t engage.

“Because one believes in oneself, one doesn’t try to convince others. When one is content with oneself, one doesn’t need others’ approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her.”
~ Lao Tzu

Decision #16: Live in The Now

All you have is today. Focus on making the most of each moment. Do the next right thing that God puts in front of you. Choose to let go of past mistakes and failures. When you’re talking to someone, put energy into understanding them rather than them understanding you. Let go of the outcome!

Decision #17: Improve Your Social Skills

Do something every day to get better socially. Gain skills in successfully dealing with people. Read and apply the information from books like How to Talking to Strangers by Malcolm Gladwell.

Decision #18: Be Generous

Be generous with your time and resources to help others. Your motivation shouldn’t be to fix people, but rather to inspire them to see their potential. Being genuinely curious about others is generous as well. Asking great questions shows others how much you value them.

If you found this information helpful, SUBSCRIBE TODAY to access my Free video & worksheet, Shatterproof Yourself: 7 Small Steps to a Giant Leap in Your Mental Health.

Kickstart Your Self-Confidence (post) – by Adam Gragg
Take Risks Frequently (post) – by Adam Gragg
How to Like & Value YOUrself (post) – by Adam Gragg
How to Be a Better Friend to Yourself (post) – by Adam Gragg

Decide Your Legacy Podcast #66: How to Believe in Yourself on Apple & Spotify