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16 Ways to Build Self-Confidence (Part 1)

Tough Decisions that WILL Transform Your Life

By on Jul 30, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

My confidence has taken a beating in recent years. I’ve had some low moments. Rebuilding my confidence comes down to making hard DECISIONS. Here are the actions I’m trying to take to believe in myself again. They will help you as well. 

12 Confidence Building Decisions

Decision #1: Grow in Humility

I can be filled with self-pity, focusing on how others are better than me. I can be arrogant, focusing on how I might be better than others. Both perspectives are wrong. I’m always at my best when I’m humble, remembering that I’m no better and no worse than anyone else. 

Decision #2: Know You Can Handle It

I attend Al Anon meetings. Step 3 of the 12 steps is “Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him“. Choose to trust that no matter what, you WILL make it through.  

Decision #3: Take Risks, Fail, Get Up

Decide today what 2 scary things you are going to do tomorrow. Make the phone call, ask for the sale, call up that friend from the past, meet someone new. Your confidence will grow as you’re vulnerable. 

Decision #4: Know Yourself

I’ve spent a lot of my life focusing on other people. I’ve forgotten who I am by getting lost in other people’s problems. You cannot be yourself until you know yourself. Figure out what you really enjoy. Explore new hobbies. Journal your thoughts and feelings consistently. Meet new people. Explore new passions.

“If a man happens to find himself … he has a mansion which he can inhabit with dignity all the days of his life.” – James Michener

Decision #5: Deal With Your Past

Hiding from past trauma has damaged me and those I love. Deal with your stuff. You cannot heal something that you deny. Many of my clients have experienced freedom from accepting and dealing with their past. Join a support group. Hire a great therapist. Create a timeline of you life experiences and see what come up. 

Decision #6: Put Yourself First

Unhealthy people put the needs of others ahead of their own. This is co-dependency. They do this because they fear rejection for saying “no”. Take time for self-care. Buy yourself something nice. Splurge. You’re worth it.

Decision #7: Be Grateful

Choose to focus on what you have rather than what you don’t have. WHEN IN DOUBT, GO TO GRATITUDE.

Decision #8: Express Your Emotions

I often know how other people feel but not how I feel. Identify how you feel, why you feel that way, and what you need. Kindly tell others. Be assertive. Have the courage to be emotionally honest on a consistent basis. 

Here are 8 more decisions you can make to build, or rebuild, your self- confidence.

Question: Do you believe these decisions could help you? Why or why not?

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